Friday, September 28, 2007

Soft Comfort


Kecia kept the tears at bay in the morning by being busy; she got Robby dressed while Peter and Kim ate cereal and waffles, then made sure coats and book bags were in the hands of her two oldest children and they were out the door in plenty of time for the school bus. That left her with more than enough time to bundle Robby up and drive him to day-care. There was only one moment when her control nearly slipped. She was helping Robby get unbuckled from the car seat when he asked, "Is Daddy going to be home tonight?"

She strove to keep her voice calm. "No, honey, we discussed that last night, remember? Daddy's not going to be living at home anymore."

"Why not?"

Because your Daddy's fucking his twenty-year-old law clerk. "Because your Dad and I think it would be best if we stayed apart for a little while, OK? Don't worry, honey - it'll be all right."

"OK." He paused, and then looked up at her, his tender face peering out from under his hat. "Is it because I broke the camera?"

And that was the question that nearly made her lose control and start crying as helplessly as she had last night. She made herself hang on long enough to kneel down and look Robby in the face. "No, honey, it's not that at all. Believe me, this is not your fault. I love you very much, and your dad does too." If the insensitive bastard were capable of love, I wouldn't be having this talk. "We just have a little problem loving each other right now, OK?" A brief nod from her son. "OK, go on now. You don't want to be late."

He wrapped his arms around her and clumsily kissed her cheek, then was off to his carefree Kindercare existence. Kecia got herself into the car and pulled away, then let herself go. The tears came out again, stinging and seemingly unending. She was scarcely aware of the road in front of her, although she vaguely knew that she was not heading back towards her house. Fine, she thought bitterly. There's nothing there for me anyway. An empty house, an empty marriage. She wiped tears angrily from her eyes.

She picked a bad time to do that. The action, along with her general distress, caused her to completely miss the green Volvo station wagon backing briskly out of a driveway on her right. When she did see the car in front of her, it was far too late. Kecia hit the brakes and swerved to the left, but the right front of her light blue Escort hit the back of the larger car with an authoritive SLAM.

Silence. Kecia gulped and tried to get herself under control. Could anything else go wrong, she thought resentfully, with this screwed-up life of mine.

She opened her door and got out, just as the Volvo's door opened to reveal a young woman with brown, shoulder-length hair and a worried expression on her face. The young woman immediately began talking.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I was in a hurry, I just backed up without even looking. Are you all right?"

Kecia nodded. "Are you OK?" she asked. The other nodded.

"Just shook up, I think," she replied. "Look at me, I'm trembling. I can't believe it. I've never had an accident before. I'm so sorry."

Kecia burst into tears.

The other woman looked at her, dumbfounded. "What's wrong? Are you all right? The damage isn't that bad, and my insurance will pay for everything..."

"Not your fault..." Kecia managed to gasp out.

"What?"

"The accident. Not your fault. It was me. My fault. I was crying, and I didn't watch where...sniff....where I was going, and I hit you, and it's my fault, and...oh, you're so nice about it....." Kecia gave up trying to speak, and just stood there and sobbed.

"Oh, no," the other woman said earnestly. "I always come out of the driveway too fast. Ken was always telling me that someone's going to hit me, and now....oh, look, it's fine. Don't worry. I bet you can just drive away, and there's almost nothing wrong with my car, see? Just a few dents. They can fix this easy as pie!" The young woman's tone had gotten a little desperate, as Kecia continued to weep helplessly.

"Look, tell you what. Just pull the car over here, and I'll go back in the driveway, and you can come inside for a cup of coffee, OK? It's not that bad, you'll see."

Kecia allowed herself to be led gently back to her car. The Escort started up immediately, and she maneuvered it to the side of the road. The other driver had pulled her car back into the driveway, and now led Kecia up to the side door of a well-kept house.

In the kitchen, with a steaming cup of coffee in front of her, Kecia was beginning to calm down a bit. "Thank you so much, you've been so nice to me, after I hit your car and everything....I'm Kecia Milner."

"Dawn Ashley," the younger woman replied. She paused a moment. "Listen, I don't want to get too personal here, but... well, I mean... uh, is everything OK?"

"Oh, sure," said Kecia. "Everything's....." and she started to sob again.

"Oh, hey, it's all right," said Dawn. "Hey, I've had rough days. It'll all work out."

"I've...sniff...I've had rough days too, but not like this. Yesterday my....my husband and I split up. He moved out last night. I had to get the kids off to school with them all wondering what was going on, and... and Robby asked why his daddy wasn't at home, and ... and then I hit you."

"Whoa. OK, lady, I gotta hand it to you. That *is* a rough day." She got up from the table. "This is not a coffee event. This...." she had opened the refrigerator and was rummaging around, "...is a chablis fix."

"Oh, no, I couldn't," Kecia said. "It's still morning and everything. It's not even 8:30 yet."

"With the day you're having, trust me - a little wine won't hurt you." She had deftly poured two glasses, and now handed one to Kecia, who looked at it doubtfully.

"Well....I guess one glass won't hurt."

"That's the spirit! Come on, we'll be more comfortable in the living room."

".......and then he actually said to me, the sonnavabitch, he said, 'She's twice the woman you are, Kecia, at least she moves in bed.'" Kecia paused and blinked owlishly at Dawn. "And so I said, 'Does she move around for the full minute or just the last ten seconds or so?'"

"Good for you," Dawn cheered. "Did he say how long it had been going on? No more for me, thanks." This last was added as Kecia poured the last of the wine into Dawn's glass. The empty bottle went to join its empty neighbor on the coffee table. "No. He wouldn't even own up to it at first. I had to tell him I'd seen them in his car, going at it like animals. And then he just says, 'You were spying on me?'"

"Well, you're better off without him," Dawn said wisely.

"Yes," declared Kecia, "I'm...better...off...oh, god!" And the tears came again. Dawn moved nearer and cradled Kecia's head on her shoulder, making quiet shooshing noises and stroking the older woman's hair. "I'm...sniff...I'm thirty-six years old, and my marriage is over, and I have three kids, and... I'll never find anyone else...."

"Oh, sure you will. You're a wonderful lady. You're smart, and good-looking, and you dress nicely, and you have good taste, and any man would be lucky to be with you."

Kecia looked up into Dawn's face. "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"Oh, I am not. It's true. Why, look at you. You've got a great body. You've got a pretty face. I bet guys come on to you all the time." Kecia shook her head, liking the way the movement pushed her against Dawn's shoulder. Dawn brushed tears away with her free hand, then, without knowing she was going to do it, leaned down and softly kissed Kecia's cheek. The touch sent a pleasurable tingle through Kecia's body. "See," Dawn said. "A very pretty face. Beautiful brown eyes."

Kecia lifted herself off Dawn's shoulder. She knew, somewhere in the back of her mind, that something was happening here, but was almost powerless to resist it. Dawn looked anxiously at Kecia as she leaned closer. "And your eyes are beautiful, too," Kecia breathed. "Beautiful blue eyes." This last was delivered with Kecia's face about two inches from Dawn's. Dawn's eyes closed, and the two women kissed. It was a light, tentative kiss.

"Um, Kecia, are you sure that we..." Dawn started to say. Another kiss cut off the sentence, and Dawn moaned against Kecia's mouth. The younger woman's mouth opened, and their tongues met, fought a brief battle, and parted friends. The intimate act sent a shudder through Kecia's body. She pulled Dawn's body to hers, running her hands up and down Dawn's back. She pulled her head back, and Dawn moved forward, showering her face and neck with little kisses. Dawn's hands now had their turn to wander, and she explored Kecia's breasts, cupping them in turn. She then reached down and lifted Kecia's shirt. Kecia raised her arms, and the shirt was gone. A moment later her bra followed suit, and Dawn was nibbling at Kecia's tits. Her nipples were rock-hard, and the touch of Dawn's lips on each in turn sent shivers of bliss through her body. Dawn nuzzled at her breasts, then continued her journey downward, each little bite and suck sending waves of pleasure through Kecia's body, and Kecia gave herself over to it. She leaned back on the sofa as Dawn began to kiss her belly, lower and lower. Dawn looked up at her.

"Do you want me to....keep going?" the younger woman asked.

"God, yes." Kecia reached down and unzipped her blue jeans, then lifted her hips to wiggle out of them. Dawn took over the task, pulling them off and tossing them away. She ran her hands up Kecia's legs, passing tantalizingly close to her cleft. She kissed Kecia high up, first on one thigh and then the other, and then ran her hand down between Kecia's legs.

"Oh.... you're wet. You're so wet, aren't you? I made you wet, didn't I?" Dawn kissed the wet spot at the front of Kecia's panties, then reached up to slip them off as well, with the woman under her lifting up her hips again to aid in that effort.

Kecia's eyes were closed, and she didn't exactly know what would happen next. In fourteen years of marriage, her husband had gone down on her exactly twice, and had done so with an air of someone conferring a great favor. Still, she thought she knew what was coming, some rough licking that would create a mildly pleasurable sensation in an act that would last a couple of minutes. She felt so close to Dawn, so close to this woman that she just met, that she was eagerly awaiting even that. So it was a shock to her when she felt the young woman's tongue gently run up and down her cleft. It was a gentle caress, a flicker, a touch that promised more, and she moaned and thrust her hips forward. Now the tongue came again, more insistent, moving up and down, up and down, and now concentrating more on up, and now OH MY GOD Dawn had found the center of her being, and she lapped away as contented as a cat. With each brush, with each wiggle, the pressure was building and building. Kecia's hands were gripping the sides of the sofa now, and her head was whipping from side to side as she strained upwards looking for release. Dawn played her body like a virtuoso, somehow knowing when she was ready to explode and backing off slightly, then rekindling the fire instantly with another flicker. Dawn's hands were under her, now, holding her lower body in place as the tension built, and this time there was no denial, just faster and faster movement as the dam burst. Kecia's body went rigid as the orgasm hit her, and she could not help letting out a scream as the pleasure coursed through her body. Spasms racked her, and her face and chest were flushed red. Her nipples were almost painfully hard, and every muscle in her body reacted to the most intense physical sensation the past thirty-six years had ever offered.

Kecia lay back, her body now beginning to relax, and her head spinning. All the questions that she had not asked herself before this started were now making a belated appearance. Was this really her? Had she just come so powerfully from the touch of another woman? Was it the wine? Or was it her? Had she been gay - a lesbian - all this time? Was that what Richard had sensed, was it she that drove him away?

These thoughts in turn were banished by Dawn, who now snuggled up next to her on the sofa. Dawn had shed her clothes as well, and was now lazily stroking up and down Kecia's body. She leaned forward and kissed Kecia's cheek lightly, then a more firm kiss on the lips. In spite of herself, Kecia kissed back. Dawn broke the kiss, then said mischievously, "Can you taste yourself on my lips?" She licked her lips. "I can. You taste good." She giggled. "I told you you had good taste."

"Oh, my."

"Oh, my, what?"

"Oh, my god, I guess. I have never, ever, in my life, felt anything like that."

"Well, I think you needed it," Dawn declared. She paused. "Uh... was this your first time with a woman?"

Kecia nodded. "Well, there was this friend I had in junior high school, and we had sleepovers, and we'd tickle each other's stomachs and stuff. But never anything even remotely serious. We were just playing around." She paused. "Look, honestly, Dawn? Part of me wants to run screaming from the room right now. And on the way out to my car I could tell myself that I drank too much wine, and I was in emotional turmoil, and it just happened, and it wasn't really me, because I'm not like that." She paused again. "But another part of me wants to lie here with you..." she leaned over and kissed the younger woman "...and forget about everything else in my life." She looked at the ceiling and waited for the rest of the words to come. "But....if I do that, if I stay here now, I'm running away from some things that I should fix instead of running away from. You know?" She paused again. "I.... I think I want to pursue this side of me, this...this thing that, until today, I didn't know I had." She kissed Dawn again. "See, this is the most rational thinking I've done in the past month, and I probably have you to thank for that. I was a wreck this morning. God, I feel so much better now! Maybe it's just from being desired, from feeling wanted, from making love..." another kiss "...from the most incredible lovemaking I've ever had." She propped herself up on one elbow to look down at her lover. "I think... to be fair to you and be fair to me... I need to not dive into this thing headfirst. I need to walk into it, if I'm going to get there, with my eyes open. You know?" She looked into Dawn's eyes, looking for approval.

Dawn smiled. "Listen. What we had here was wonderful. And I'm open to more, but the last thing I want to do is push you into something you'll regret." She sobered. "Maybe I should have given that speech before we started, huh?"

Kecia grinned. "Too late now." She kissed Dawn's forehead and sat up. "Seriously, I....I'm not running away. I just want to sort things out, that's all." She leaned back for a moment, and then said, "I better get dressed." She got up and began hunting around for her clothes. In the midst of dressing, she came back over to the sofa, sat down, and gave Dawn a long, full kiss.

"What was that for?"

"For being a very comfortable person to be around. I just realized that during my entire marriage I hated to be naked in front of Richard. I'd always want to change in the bathroom, and scoot under the covers. I've known you for an hour and a half and I feel like I can do anything in front of you. God, even the way I'm talking to you! I would never have believed I'd be saying these things!"

Dawn leaned forward and kissed Kecia. "Well, my dear.... you are a very comfortable person to be around too." She hopped up, and was back in a second in a robe. "The better to see you off in, my dear. Lord knows what the neighbors will think."

They exchanged another kiss inside the door, and then Kecia went down the driveway and over to her broken car. She drove off, already planning a call to the body shop, a series of calls to find a good divorce lawyer, and a good long talk with herself. She had no idea where this day's events would lead her, but she was looking forward to finding out.


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